Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
* Why do people say, "you've been working like a dog" when dogs just sit around all day?
* Can you write in pencil on an eraser?
* How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
* Why is it that when we are humming and then we plug our nose, our humming stops? Do people really hum through their nose, or their mouths?
* Can you blow a balloon up under water?
* Can crop circles be square?
* How do they get the air inside the bubble wrap?
* Why are there black lines on a basketball?
* If we had a president that was a woman, would her husband be the first man?
* Why do we have to wait till the water starts boiling before we can put
pasta into the water?
* If a criminal turns himself in shouldn't he get the reward money?
* Why are blue Christmas lights so popular? Aren't red and green the
traditional colors?
* Why do police officers wear tight clothes and dressy shoes? wouldn't that make them slower when chasing someone?
* If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?
* Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
* Why do birds bob their heads when they walk?
* Why is it when we ask for the check in a restaurant they bring us a bill?
* How come wine and hard liquor doesn't come in cans, but beer does?
* When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?
* If people say if you eat dessert before dinner it will ruin your appetite wont eating dinner before dessert ruin your appetite for dessert?
* Why do they call him a Skipper when he just stands there?
* Why does "lake" come first (Lake Michigan) and "river" come second (Mississippi River)?
* If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
* If I raise the volume on my radio, does it use more electricity?
* What would happen if: Everyone was to flush their toilet at the same time?
* Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on?
* If you died on the International Dateline, and half of you were on 1 side and the other half on the other side, what day would you die?
* If someone crashes his or her car on purpose, why is it still a car accident?
* If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price?
* If the weather man says "it's a 50% chance of rain" does that mean he has no idea if its going to rain or not?

* Why is the word "abbreviate" so long?
* Don't you have to get up to get to the tape?
* Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?
* Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?
* Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards?
* Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
* Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
* Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
* You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
* Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
* After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?
* You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, * why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
* Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?
* Have ex-bankers become disinterested?
* Have ex-civil lawyers been distorted?
* Have ex-locomotive engineers been derailed?
* Have ex-mathematicians become dysfunctional?
* Have ex-punsters been expunged?

* Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
* Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
* Why are the cabs from the Yellow Cab Company painted orange?
* Why are there never any artist's materials in a drawing room?
* Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
* Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
* Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
* Why are we afraid of falling?
* Shouldn't we be afraid of the sudden stop?
* Why aren't there bulletproof pants?
* Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
* Why didn't Luke Skywalker tell Darth Vader to turn to the light side of the Force?
* Why do airlines call flights nonstop?
* Won't they all stop eventually?
* Why do bars advertise live bands?
* What does a dead band sound like?
* Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
* If your feet smell and your nose runs, are you built upside down?
* Why do guys wear underpants?
* Why do people who only eat natural foods drink decaffeinated coffee?
* Why do they call it disposable douche?
* Is there a kind of douche you keep after using?
* Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together?
* Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
* Why do they report power outages on TV?
* Why do they sell a pound cake that only weighs 12 ounces?
* Why do 'tug'boats push their barges?
* Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
* Why do we have hot water heaters?
* Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?
* Why do we put suits in a garment bag and garments in a suitcase?
* Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?
* Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
* Why do you weep and sniffle over a TV program and the imaginary Why does "cleave" mean both split apart and stick together?
* Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
* Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
* Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
* Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?
* Why don't you ever hear about gruntled employees?
* Why don't you ever see baby pigeons?
* Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
* Why is a women's prison called a penal colony?
* Why is it called a "building" when it is already built?
* Why is it called a bust, when it stops right before the part it is named after?
* Why is it called a TV "set" when you only get one?
* Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?
* Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?
* Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio? Why is it when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open it's not adoor?
* Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"?
* Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?
* Why is Mickey Mouse bigger than his dog Pluto?
* Why is the alphabet in that order?